Ahhhh, those good ol' memories

So, isn't it amazing what memories we remember and our reactions to the catalysts of those memories?

I remember, quite vividly in fact, the moment my wife announced that she was pregnant, with our first child. It was like a smack to the side of my head... Wait a minute, it WAS a smack to the side of my head. It was around 6 'o clock in the morning, (and I'm not what you might call an early riser, in fact I've been know to wake up just in time for bed), and I was sound asleep when out of nowhere there was this thunderous crash just above and on my left ear.

Now, living in South Africa, one tends to be over paranoid due to the violent crime rate that keeps fighting for the number one spot with the HIV rate. So anyway, the first thought that rushed through my head was, "Oh shit! We are becoming a statistic of the numerous home invasions that has recently increased in my neighbourhood." Well, actually the thought was a bit more colourful than that but I've been told that my blog holds quite a bit of profanity so I'm holding back a smidgeon. Once I believed that it was a house breaking turned possibly who knows what, I thought "Oh no! My Playstation... my games... my DVD collection.... err.... my wife," not that this is how I prioritise that which is dear to me ;)

It was the, then bitter tone that my wife used, even though that up until today she still disputes it, that brought me out of my trance-like state of sleepiness and morbid fear to realise that she was speaking to me.

"Huh?" I replied.

"I said, look at what you've done to me!" (minus the whack)

Given that I'd just woken up from my sound slumber and that it was 6 in the morning, it took me a few seconds to realise that she was holding something in her hand. No, it was not a frying pan like some of you from the peanut gallery may suggest. It was in fact a home pregnancy test that held two little powder blue parallel lines in one of the two boxes. I would have to say that at this moment I was 82.7% excited but the remaining 17.3% (yes, it does add up to 100 - I checked) was like, "Does it mean positive or negative?" and "Which one's good - positive or negative?" Bear in mind that I did say I live in South Africa where the HIV rate is quite high so forgive me for asking the question. Anyway, it was the good positive and not the positive where is it's actually negative.

Back to my senses now, and all I could do was scream, at 6 o' clock in the morning (my neighbours probably thought that this was a home invasion gone bad by the loud wail that sounded like an owl on ecstacy), "Whooohooo! My soldiers work!" I kissed my wife, saying "You're welcome," and ran to double-check the instructions on the box. I was excited beyond belief. Called in a sick day at work, got ready and went for the blood test immediately even though I knew I'm gonna be a daddy.

Anyway, that is what I remember about finding out that I was a father to be for the first time.

To those that are reading this and questioning yourselves about the previous line... Yes, I'm gonna be a daddy again. Whoooohoooo x2! And FUCK YEAH, my soldiers still work!

Tthe memories related to the second time I found out that I was gonna be a daddy again, was very similar to that of the first... well except for the smack to my head.... and the thoughts of breaking and entering gone wrong.... and the potential loss of my Playstation, games, DVD collection and...errr... wife.... and the questioning of the two powder blue parallel lines..... okay okay, it was completely different but that will be another post entirely.

So, until my next post, take it easy. And if you get it easy, take it again.